Need time to think ...

I am going to be taking a few days off to think about my life and do some personal stuff.

So I would not be answering my e-Mails and/or replying my sms.

Until then....

A reflection .....

I have been taking a lot of time to reflect and consider my options in life.

1. True Leadership.

I found that the mark of a true leader is not about winning or losing. It is having a compassionate heart and a determination to do what's right and the wisdom to know what not to do at any given time. Life can be a War. In that respect, there are some battles that should not be fought. It is always wise to choose my battles and who I support in battles, otherwise, I may not be able to shoulder the consequences. I must never engage in a battle that I cannot win or have no confidence in winning (Read Sun Tzu: The Art of War. The battle is won before it is ever fought). Life can be brutal, that's true. Life can be unpredictable. And Life can be the best teacher I know, if I allow it. In that respect, it has taught me that if I want to be a good student, I must first empty my cup of coffee. Otherwise, I am not going to be able to taste the "new coffee flavour of the month". In other words, another mark of a true leader is humility.

To learn to listen until the next person has finished is a sign of humility. To take time to analyze what is being said is a sign of respect for others. After that, to accept or reject what is being said is a sign of decisiveness. In other words, to empty my cup first so the new coffee flavour of the month can be poured into my cup. To take time to savour the aroma and taste, and finally to either appreciate it or politely refuse another cup.


2. True Fatherhood

I found that the mark of a true father is about being there when my son needs me, to protect him, to teach him what's right from wrong, to show him how to do things properly and also to be his best buddy for life. Once I know these, it is even more important to make time to spend with him, to be a person of high moral standards and stong ethics so I can be the best role model for him, also make sure I spend time researching the questions he asked so I can properly explain to him and that I have to make sure he knows that my doors are always open to him, no matter what time of the day. All these and more. It is truly a learning experience! One that I intend to excel in.

Think about it. Please feel free to comment.

I am back....

I am back.

In any case, I have not been blogging becos got no mood and a host of other reasons...

I am for the moment, a bit busy...with my real-life.


Heh-heh. I am going to start posting regularly from today onwards.

I am still stuck in a mess...

I have not been able to clear up all my stuff...

As I continue to look through the items I have collected, I also have my career to work on, meetings to attend, deadlines to meet and family gatherings to go to and also a few important events to attend.

Hence, it looks like I am going to need more time, another few days before I can sort out the stuff I have collected, which to throw, which to keep in storage, which to put up on display and etc.

Anyways, unless I clear up all of it, I won't have much time for blogging or any other personal activities anymore. *sigh*

Positive Parenting...

I came across some interesting information (while sorting out my stuff)...

Positive Parenting

1. Give them time

2. Re-discover the power of praise - For every one action of scolding, we must offer nine actions of praises as encouragement to do what is good for them.

3. Laugh More - Children enjoys people who have a good sense of humor.

4. Don't delegate the time to be with them, be there! - Take time to spend with your children, to show them the way to being good citizens and contribute to society. Lead by example. So when you are old, they are going to be with you also.

5. Defend the boundaries - Always teach them the do and don'ts of life. These are not just a matter of disciplin but for their personal safety as well. Also as a parent, you must also spend some time to monitor who their friends are and what they are being exposed as it may not be suitable for their age.

6. Let them go but always make sure the door to your home is always open to them.

Simple advise but yet, these are some of the most fundamentals that can go a long way and prevent many problems that develop later in life. Sure make me think more about my lifestyle as a parent. I am not saying that I had never put the above into practice but rather, there are always room for improvements in my current lifestyle to make time for all the above points. I am glad that I did not throw away this piece of information.

To throw or not to throw, that is my question...for today...

To throw or not to throw, that is my question... for today and probably for the rest of the week.

I have finally gotten round to sorting out my stuff .... since I last did it (I think it was back in 2004 when I last did it..??) and I have managed to accumulate more stuff than I could possibly imagine. I had no idea how these stuffs, things or whatever anyone wants to call it, ended up with me. Gifts from friends, unopened letters from friends (overseas, sorry about that), things that I bought but ended up not using, DVDs and VCDs (wow, that has been quiite some time since I last bought any VCDs) which I have not seen, even some I don't remember ever buying, etc, etc, and even books that I don't remember ever buying...fortunately, I have not bought any books twice yet.

From my last count (about 10 minutes ago), I now have a collection of more than 723 books and well over 900 copies of Magazines of various titles from Forbes, Economists, FHM, PC Magazaine, New Man, etc. I am very proud to say that I have completed more than half of my book-collection and read through at least 70% of my magazine-collection.

I am certainly having more than a big headache about what to throw and not to throw....as I continue to go through the many boxes which has many folders, plastic bags and gifts and items,...arrggggh. I have to come to a decision....

Now, I have to get back to sorting and decide what to throw and what to keep (my Wife wants me to throw all of it away.....)

It is how I respond to it....

One reason why I started this blog was to allow my family and friends to keep up to date with my current-events. I also wanted to use it to re-discover myself and use it as a medium for me to share some of my ideas, world-views and even photos, so I don't have to constantly repeat myself to the various groups of friends and relatives such as cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.

It is how I respond to it...

Nowadays, I rarely drink anything alcoholic, not even beer and I don’t smoke. I go to the gym to improve my health and fitness. My aim is to get to my ideal weight, built a lean, mascular and fit body. I have taken less rice and noodles, refrain from oily foods and sweetened-drinks. As a result, I normally eat at home and when I go out with friends, I normally order Fruit Juice w/out sugar or Plain Black Coffee w/out the sugar and milk.

Why do I do this???

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
- Carol Burnett

I am now in my early 30's and my Wife has already start to say that I have a physical body of 50 year man. Even my Doctor agrees after the results from my blood-test indicates multiple over-the-hill (more like mountains)readings. To add to the list of my sins, I never bother to change. Sure there were that occasional good deeds but the change did not come from my heart. It was not until early last year, when I was climbing up 2 flights of stairs and my chest hurts, my heart-rate was so fast and furious (not to be confused with the movie, but it was just as dangerous)...that's when I decide that I really need to do something about it.

Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it.
- Lou Holtz

When I go out, no matter it is with friends or clients/customers, I seldom order any thing to eat, just either orange juice without sugar or ice-coffee without sugar or milk. They would ask why am I not eating or even tempt me with their food. True, given my history, I would definitely give in. But now, I realized that by simply saying "No, Thanks" or "I have to eat with my family", they let me be. It is how I respond to it. In addition, I refrain from private drinking-parties and again, they would tempt me or say "Scare of your wife?", in which I say, "Yes, I am scare of her losing me." and they let me be. It is how I respond to it.

Because I love my family and I don't want my Wife to lose her husband to stroke, diabetes, heart-attacks or liver-diseases or cancer. I don't want my Son to lose his father to stroke, diabetes, heart-attacks or liver-diseases or cancer. I don't want my Mom to lose her son, like she did her husband to Liver Cancer. And I do not want to lose them as well. All the people I love are going to lose me unless I do something about it.

Back to Gym.

I am going back to the Gym starting tomorrow.

Although both my wrists still needs to rest, there is nothing wrong with my lower part of the body. So, I am starting my Cardio training again, and work on my Legs Major Muscles, 20 mins of Sauna. Finally my Abdominals and Stretching.

More of this later. Have to prepare to sleep now so I can wake up 7am tomorrow for Gym.

Injuries.....of the present and that of the past...

I injured both my wrists and left ankle because I was overloading during my Gym Workouts.

It happened more than 2 weeks ago and since then, I have been taking it easy with light weight only. But on Monday, it was hurting more and more. So I decided to go visit the Chinese Traditional Doctor who after 3 mins of treatment for each wrist, (which by the way was bending my wrists and twisting it with a low but audible poping sound) told me that I had partial dislocated joints and was biting into the nerves and tissue (is that even possible??) but as it was getting more and more inflammed on Monday, I guess there would be some truth in what he was saying (more of this later).
As for my ankle, I had slight pull in my tendons which will take 1 week to heal provided I sit down most of the time and not walk/run much, if at all. And my thoughts ran back to my younger days...

The past...

I know that injuries come with the terriotory but I had not expect it to be this bad. The last time I had this bad was from my street-fights back in Toronto, Canada, back in the mid 90s.

As I was in my early 20s, I still thought that I was invincible and allowing my hormones to dictate what my actions as opposed to logic and rationale. I studied Shito-ryu Karate back when I was a teenager and then studied Wing-Chun Fists from my friend (more on this later). After 7 years of training, you would have thought I have gain enough maturity but it only serves to put me in extreme situations.

In any case, I was arrogant and foolhardy. Reckless and Hot-headed. I also often drink at pubs and odd places in the neighbourhood, often with my buddies. It was not until sometime in mid-90s that I picked a fight with someone who looked at me the wrong way where my right hand was practically dislocated by someone whom I thought was a push-over. I also suffered 2 punishing blows to my solar-plexus which literally took the wind out of me. Almost lost consciousness.

What shocked/stunned me the most was that I did not exactly know how I was defeated. All I remembered was I slided in left at a 45 degrees angle, which was his blind-spot and launched a right back-fist to the right temple of his head (tai-yang xue) but my blow struck nothing but air. Before I knew what happened my right hand (no longer was holding a fist) emitted a bone cracking sound, followed by immense pain. Next thing I felt was 2 blows to my solar-plexus, forcing me back at least 5 steps before stopping and falling on my back. (He had let go of my right hand and must have struck me with that same hand).

I then realized the meaning of the words often warning me of my arrogance from my Sensei and my friend. "Yi San Gen You Yi San Gao" or "There is always someone better than you."

He helped me back and without saying a word just left me barely standing outside the back of the Pub Restaurant. I admitted that it was my fault for picking the fight and thinking I was invincible and all that. After my visit to the Chinese Traditional Doctor, I was told that whoever that person was who did this had held back or my hand would have been paralyzed for life. And the blows to my solar-plexus missed the nerve-points located there but my back-bone was not so lucky as they have to be popped back in place, but with no permanent injuries.

After that I met up with the guy again, but this time on friendly terms. I want to treat him to a round of beer which he refrained saying that coffee would do. I found out a few things about him. Apparently he was trained in the Shaolin Temple in China since he was 7 years of age. And he had only immigrated to Toronto, Canada about 6 months ago. He was 25 years old then. He studied Eagle-Claw Hands, Arhat Fists and some internal breathing systems and some weaponaries. Then it was not a shame (at least on my part) to lose to someone who has been training all his life. After that we hardly meet up anymore... I guess he is the loner type who tries to blend into the surrounding rather than wanting to be focus of attention.

Funny, why this memory came up...

I realized that many of the advises that my Mentors and Coaches (including my Sensei and the friend who taught me Wing Chun Fists mentioned) is true and comes with experiences which I have yet to understand. Over the years, I have my fair share of challenges and obstacles in life and these reminders seem to float up to the surface of my mind and helped me through the challenges and obstacles, by not falling into the traps of discouragements, disillusions and mostly, it kept me striving to be better than what I am (or was). It has helped me in building up my business and also staying focused in my Life's Principles (more of that later).
Through this experience really showed me that there is still a lot I have yet to know and humbled me down. After that particular incident, I am less inclined to pick a fight...although I still love Martial Arts.

Back to the present...
Of the last 2 years, I have hardly spoke much about Wing Chun Fists or Karate or anything similar to this. I guess, I know in my heart, that for someone who have not been praticing at all for the past 5 years, should not really discussed too much...

Those who knew me in Canada, today, often mentioned that I have changed a lot, for the better. I am more calm and relaxed, less inclined to show-off, more patient and humble. On the negative side, put on more weight (yes, became fat) and just last week, developed a strong craving for Mango Cheesecake. Right now, I am a 7-day resting day which I joked to my Wife it is my sabbatical from the Gym.

Those who knew me in 2000, today says that I have changed a lot as well, for the better. I have achieved much business sense and acumen, in other words to be calm and decisive in matters during negotiations and deal-making, more frugal in my spending habits, able to develop better business and marketing plans, less theory, more plans of actions with experience and sound rationale to back it up and knowing when to cut my losses and walk away. On the negative side, I have to learn to make time for my family and spend quality time with them, make it a point to come home for dinners at least 5 times a week, spend at least 2 hours a day with my Son, and basically just to be at home after 8pm every night. That is what I intend to make it so but often managed to accomplish about half of that only.

Only in May of last year, did I start to go back to the Gym for some physical training. I have been injury-free until 2 weeks ago. I guess, I just have to be more careful.

What are the relationships of Life and Coffee?

What is Life ? What is Coffee ?

My definition of Life is a Journey filled with strong emotions, sometimes we go through stages of extreme emotions while at times, we are in a dull state. It is important to know that we must balance all the emotions during our journey. Our ability to remain calm, focused and still able to enjoy the experience even admist difficult trials and challenges, is dependent on our ability to control our emotions.

My definition of Coffee is a stimulant that gives me the extra boost I need to maintain such control of my emotions. Studies have now shown it contains anti-oxidants which is a classification of several organic substances, selenium, including Vit C, E and A. Vitamin A is converted from beta-carotene. It also contains carotenoids, which adds color to many fruits and vegetables. All these, when combined are called antioxidants which are effective in helping to prevent cancer, heart diseases and stroke. Hence, Coffee is the life-blood that really help me to maintain emotional control.

Life without coffee would be unthinkable. Their relationship is such that Life is the Passion and Coffee is the Commitment. What is Passion? What is Commitment?

Passion is your desire to get the job done or to reach your goals. Our desires changes according to our circumstances. When we are met with obstacles or stumbling blocks, we sometimes become frustrated, confused or discouraged. What can prevent this? The answer is simple but not something we do very well. Commitment.

Committment means to accept what you have to do to get the job done or to reach your goals. To do whatever it takes to get the job done - without complaining and whining, in other words, to remain calm, focused and able to enjoy the moment of it.

Therefore, Passion without Commitment first, is not going to be long-lasting.

Do it tomorrow (or the day after)...

Please note: I always enjoy my cup of coffee with cream and little/no sugar. Drinking Coffee, smelling it's aroma, especially Blue Mountain, is very relaxing and soothing to my mind, body and spirit.

Procrastination seems to built into our DNA. Somewhere along the double-helix are the codes to put things off to a later time or date. It is also in our nature to rationalize our putting off with good reasons.

Why on earth do we procrastinate? The dictionary definition means to "delay or postpone an action" however, it does not define it as a positive nor a negative action. There are times when we do it because we have not have all the facts yet or we were simply lazy and hence postpone the action. Sometimes we are afraid of negative results while at other times, we were simply indifferent to the outcome. What is certain is that there are consequences to each of our actions, may it be positive or negative ones.

Take my blogsite, I know that I should be updating it regularly, embellish it with photos and pictures but I simply was too busy...(doing what???, one might ask!)

(Rationalized)Reasons: (1)My buddies and I went out for drinks as coffee is very important to me as it is part of my life-blood. I literally cannot function without 2 cups of Coffee a day, (2)Quality time with My Wife and Son, like shopping, dinners, open-hearted discussions and play with my 5 year Son is very important as well, (3) I had several reports to write and important clients to meet-up(and impress, otherwise why would they want to work with my company (and me?))

Hence, because of the 3 (rationalized) reasons, I had to procrastinate doing my blogsite. Come to think of it, I have not really procrastinate when it comes to drinking coffee. That's life and coffee for me. Both go hand in hand. Just like my Wife, who also must have her cup of coffee every morning and her afternoon break, so must I. My Wife and I are a team of sorts, and definitely my soul-mate for life!

The meaning of Life and Coffee has always intrigued me when I saw many interesting connections between them. Life has been always been bitter-sweet to me and my cup of coffee is often bitter-sweet, especially when my Wife makes it for me.
Through thick and thin, I always have a cup of coffee in my hands.
Rushing my Assignments/Term-paper/Exams in University, a cup of coffee is there.
Meeting with my buddies, often than not, I always order a cup of coffee.
Meeting with important clients, a cup of coffee is within reach of my right hand as I go through my presentation with my left hand holding the paper or pressing the button on my notebook.
Before I start my work everyday, I must have a cup of coffee first.
Usually After Dinner at home with my Wife, when we start our sharing for the day, each of us holding a cup of coffee in our hand, we sip and chat away (for an hour and a half or so, then it is time to spend time with my kid).
To say that Life without Coffee would be unthinkable is the truth. It has always been a part of my life since I was 10 years old.
My Wife and members of my family are all coffee-drinkers. I would not call all of them coffee-lovers. And my kid is no different but as he is still a kid, the Wife and I still refrain him from drinking coffee. Maybe when he is older.

I hope that my sharing today can present more about myself. I chose "Procrastination" as an intro because I have indeed been putting this blogsite off for some time now.

To learn more about me, here are 10 websites that I frequent:
(a) www.kennysia.com,
(b) xiaxue.blogspot.com
(c) faerieanne.blogspot.com
(d) www.flexonline.com
(e) www.askmen.com
(f) www.starbucks.com
(g) www.startrek.com
(h) www.donnieyen.com
(i) www.ironmanarmory.com
(j) www.comicsworld.com

I have been inspired by these sites. I have been touched by these sites. I sure would like to have coffee with the people behind the making/design/sharing of these sites.

Bye for now.

Consistency is the KEY to Success.

I have been going to gym from May 2005 to October 2005 and then took a 3 month break due to business trips and also for Chinese New Year. When I went back again last month, I found that my stamina had decreased (probably due to me putting back some the weights I lost, during Christmas, New Year Party Bash, Chinese New Year etc). My strength has also dropped by at least 20%, when translated means, I could not lift as heavy as before and could do less repetitions per set. It is only 3 months break, how could it have such an effect on my performance? Because I was not consistent in my training.

Consistency is the KEY to Success.

Right now, I am doing a 5-day Training Program focusing on overloading for the first 2 months and high-reps, low weights for the third month. I repeat the cycle again.

Overloading simply means from light to heavy with a decrease in reps for each set. For example, doing bench-press, I lift 30kgs, 15 times for the 1st set. After completing it, I lift 45kgs, 10 times for the 2nd set. Then, I lift 60Kgs, 5 times for the 3rd set and finally, I lift 80Kgs, 3 times for the last set. This is used to build muscle mass and develop greater strength.

High-reps, low weights means I lift light weights with a higher frequency for each set. For example, doing bench-press. I lift 20kgs, 20 times for the 1st set. After completing it, I lift 25kgs, 20 times for the 2nd set. Then I lift 30kgs, 15 times for the 3rd set and finally, I lift 30kgs, 15 times for the last set. This is used to do "cutting" or develop greater definitions of my physique.

To acheive greater muscle-mass, consistency is a must!

The use of steroids is not advisable since it has many dangerous and harmful side-effects. I rather rely on sheer willpower and determination to reach my goals of achiveing a lean, mean and well-defined physique.

The meaning to life and coffee

Life without coffee would be unthinkable. So I won't even begin to think of such ideas.